Kelly Rowland just released a new song off her upcoming album ‘Talk A Good Game’ called ‘Dirty Laundry’. Kelly decided to get really personal in ‘Dirty Laundry’ as she sings about an abusive relationship that she found herself in a couple of years ago.
Kelly sings candidly about being physically and emotionally abused by an ex-lover. This man isolated the beautiful Rowland from her family and friends. She found herself in a horrifying situation after Destiny Child disbanded. She was embarassed and did not know how to reach out to her mama, her daddy, or her very best friend Beyonce. Check out the lyrics below:
“So here I am in the spin cycle
We’re comin and we’re goin
Nobody can know this
And I was trapped in his house, lyin’ to my mama
Thought it could get no worse as we maximize the drama
Started to call them people on him
I was battered
He hittin the window like it was me, until it shattered
He pulled me out, he said, “Don’t nobody love you but me
Not your mama, not your daddy and especially not Bey”
He turned me against my sister
I missed ya”
Kelly has the world. She is beautiful, talented, and wealthy. How could she find herself in such a horrifying situation? The sad fact is no woman is immune to the horrors of domestic violence.
As I listened to Kelly share her story yesterday tears floated down my cheek and I instantly felt bad. Last year, I heard of several stories that involved domestic violence that involved people in my circle.
One case involved a brutal attack on a young woman that resulted in an unwanted pregnancy. This young lady was a victim of an abusive step-father that lead her to runaway. She found herself in the clutches of a pimp that would force her to work the streets and who would repeatedly rape her. I am happy to report that she and her baby are away from those monsters and she is pulling her life together one day at a time.
The other case ended in a triple homicide/suicide. A close friend of mine lost one of her best friends to an abusive husband. He killed his wife, their child, and the wife’s mother before turning the gun on himself. Nobody in this lady’s circle knew that she was in trouble. It was a family secret. Can you imagine a whole family being wiped out due to domestic violence?
Each time I heard these stories I would think maybe I should address domestic violence in my writings. I have a powerful platform to address real issues.
“BUT HOW?”
I just did not know how to approach the topic.
“How do you talk about such bad things on a pretty website?”
So I chose to keep my mouth close. I chose to pray that those women who might be here reading what I had to say had another outlet to get help.
As I listened to Kelly Rowland pour her heart and soul out in that track; I instantly knew that I would have to write about domestic violence. I instantly knew that I would have to stop pretending that life is a party all of the time. I have a social and moral obligation to talk about things of substance and that includes the not so pretty.
So as I type this and try to figure out the voice I should take I decided to search tips.
How to spot a potentially abusive person:
- He pushes too far, too fast, planning your future together right away.
- He hates his mother and is nasty to her.
- He wants your undivided attention.
- He must always be in charge.
- He always has to win.
- He breaks promises all the time.
- He can’t take criticism and always justifies his actions.
- He blames someone else for anything that goes wrong.
- He’s jealous of your close friends, family members, and all other men.
- He always asks you where you went and whom you saw.
- He has extreme highs and lows that are unpredictable.
- He has a mean temper.
- He often says you don’t know what you’re talking about.
- He makes you feel like you’re not good enough.
- He withdraws his love or approval as punishment.
- He pushes you to do things that make you feel uneasy, like taking the day off from work or even breaking the law.
How to get out of an abusive relationship:
A couple of years ago I met a man who suggested that he was
“Man, enough to break me!”
I instantly deleted him from my life and never looked back. I think we should arm our women and girls with information on how to spot a creep. How to get out of bad situations.
The first step is to talk about Domestic Violence candidly.
Kudos to Kelly Rowland for being brave.
Do you have any tips?
Leave a comment below.
Story via: Freddy O.